Navigating the holiday season

Navigating the holiday season can be challenging for many neurodivergent individuals due to sensory overload, changes in routine, and social expectations that come with gatherings and celebrations.
The focus on food and eating norms can also be especially overwhelming, as many neurodivergent people may experience sensory eating differences, or have complex relationships with food that aren’t always understood or accommodated by others.

In addition to these stressors everywhere you turn, are messages promoting diet culture and healthism.

Diet culture is especially strong during the holidays. It’s often rooted in the idea that certain foods are “good” or “bad,” and that our health and worth are tied to controlling our bodies and our diets. When we start labelling food as “good or bad”, “clean”, “healthy”, “unhealthy”, we tend to also apply those same terms inwards and associate this with shame and guilt.

If you are thinking this way, please remind yourself that all foods provide nutrition.

All foods have no moral value.

What you eat or do not eat on and around the holiday season does not determine your character, health or your worth. 

Mealtimes with friends or extended family around Christmas can cause a lot of anxiety and be really difficult for some neurodivergent individuals. It may be helpful to have a few scripts ready to go in case people ask you uncomfortable questions. You can find a free pdf with examples on my shop page here. 

Below are a few other ideas on how you can support someone with feeding differenced during the holidays: 

1. Respect Food Preferences and Boundaries

Avoid pressuring them to try new foods or to eat more than they’re comfortable with. 

2. Make Safe Foods Accessible

Make sure their safe foods are available. This small gesture can provide comfort and make the holiday meal feel more inclusive and enjoyable.

3. Offer a Quiet Space for Eating

Large gatherings can be overwhelming. Ask if they might need a quieter or more private area where they can eat to help ease sensory overload, calm the nervous system and make eating more accessible. If they need to eat with distraction e.g. while watching a screen or listening to an audiobook, let them.

4. Avoid Commenting on Their Eating

Steer clear of remarks about what or how much they’re eating. Even well-meaning comments can create anxiety or discomfort. Let them feel free to eat in a way that feels right for them, without judgement or scrutiny.

5. Check in with Them Ahead of Time

If possible, reach out to discuss any preferences or concerns before the gathering. Knowing in advance what to expect can ease anxieties for both of you and ensure that they feel considered and supported during the celebration.

Written by Margo White, your Melbourne-based neurodiversity affirming Certified Practicing Nutritionist and Neurodivergent advocate.

This article is intended as general advice only and does not replace medical advice. It is recommended that you seek personalised advice specific to your individual needs.